With fibromyalgia, setting boundaries can be challenging. Members of MyFibroTeam say they often feel pressure to be their “old selves" among family and friends who don't understand. “We’re expected to suffer, to prove that the pain is that intense,” said one member. “If we're caught [smiling], [people think] we’re not feeling bad enough to justify our limitations.” Members talk about “feeling guilty” when they have to beg off family gatherings, social events, and other obligations. “Sometimes I see myself as a bad friend, daughter, sister and mom,” wrote another member. “My ex-husband never understood this disease, nor did he ever try.” Being part of a community that “gets it” can provide much-needed support for managing expectations of others - as well as your own self care. “When you need to shut down and recharge, no explanation is required other than this is what you need to do,” wrote one member of MyFibroTeam. “Thank you for writing this,” shared another. “I’m going to start giving myself permission and not feel bad about it.”

On MyFibroTeam, the social network and online support group for those living with fibromyalgia, members talk about a range of personal experiences and struggles. Managing expectations of loved ones are one of the top 10 topics most discussed.

Here are a few question-and-answer threads about managing expectations:

• "What are your expectations for a support group?"
• "Does anyone else feel guilty when you have to cancel plans with friends?"
• "Is your love life affected because of fibromyalgia?"

Here are some conversations about managing expectations:

• A member shares that her partner has pulled away in their relationship.
• A member shares when she needs to shut down and recharge on a level that others may not understand.
• A member shares that societal expectations seem to suffer as of lately.

Have another topic you'd like to discuss or explore? Go to MyFibroTeam today and start the conversation. You'll be surprised just how many others may share similar stories.

Feel free to ask a question here.